I just read that Kotex was barred from using the word "vagina" in their ad for a feminine product so they substituted "down there" instead and that was also nixed. LMFAO.....
We get to hear all about men who can't get their mojo up, peeps who fudge their undies and need Depends, and the fast talking man who speaks at the end of every ad for new drugs? Well, he doesn't quite speak fast enough for me NOT to know said drug may cause spontaneous eruption of the ass, non stop wood for more than 4 hours or some other undignified, personally explosive hazard.
It is kind of funny that we get so embarrassed over the mention of feminine products or any mention of the vagigi in general. And girls? We are number one violators in perpetuating the hysteria... Raise your hand if you have driven thru AT LEAST four 7-11 parking lots looking for the ONE store that has a female clerk. Now, sista's I know you have gone to the store only because you didn't watch the calendar and need some "feminine products" as we like to call them and that is all you needed. But instead of walking bravely up and plunking that shiny pink package with the perty flowers down on the conveyor belt, you loaded up the basket plum full of household products, Star Magazine and well, while you're at it, Sara Lee is sooo good for what ails ya!
Recently, I was visiting two of my older female employees and my purse fell over while I was talking to them. Low and behold, out pops the little pink plastic package that holds a lite days pad. Oh lord, you would've thought I farted or had shit running down my leg. I actually think they would have preferred it. They looked stunned and scared as I hastily shoved the damn neon pink grenade back into my fake Coach bag. Later, I thought how funny it was that two grown women who most assuredly have had Auntie Flo visit were so bejiggity about an accidental pad exposure....Good Lord!
Which leads me to my last story...Know what lite days feminine pads are good for? Back in the early 90's I had a Honda Civic. Now anyone who's ever had a Honda will tell you that the front windows fog up REAL easy. My devoted hubs would get really mad if I used my hands to wipe the windows, due to the smudge.
ANYWAY, while on my way home one night, I was stopped at a traffic light and the windows started to fog up really bad. I looked around and had nothing to wipe them with....UNTIL...I remembered that I had a whole box of, yep, you guessed it, KOTEX LITE DAYS in the bag beside me. I quickly grabbed one, ripped off the pretty pink wrapping, and oh so meticulously wiped down the front window while waiting for the light. Satisfied and feeling smug about my quick thinking, I then looked over to see the 2 dudes beside me literally ROLLING in their macho red truck. They were howling with laughter. I looked at them and then I started laughing as well. I held up the now dirty ,wet LITE DAYS pad and showed them how well it had done the trick. The light turned green and we went our separate ways..
Hmmm....sounds like a good commercial for KOTEX.
