Von Woos Woos Spaniella

Will you let me know?

Will you tell me when you are ready to go?

Thank you for being the love that you are!

Thank you for the puppy dog kisses, parades and happy dog dances each time I returned home.  You made me feel so loved with your pure love.

To be sure you had your issues.  A show dog with an un-showy overbite; adopted by a young couple who eventually broke up and left you holed up in the bedroom of an apartment all day for hours on end.  You sure had separation anxiety all your life from that.

You got kicked out of doggy daycare for taking exception with two new dogs sniffing your arse.  You had a heart murmur in that sweet old heart.    But you were the perfect girl for me.  Your sweet face and beautiful show dog confirmation and breeding made me melt when I saw you on the rescue site.

We drove two hours up the coast to interview for you.  The foster decided to keep you, but at the last minute decided that she was being unfair and chose our family as YOUR forever family.

And you loved your mama!  Each night, you would cuddle up beside me and sigh a deep sigh of contentment.  It made me smile each and every time.

Now you can't hear, you wobble a bit when you walk and seem a little confused.  But you still greet me with a wiggly, waggly tail.   Over the weekend, I thought you were ready to go.  You didn't seem energetic or happy.  I was sad.  It's so hard to know when to let go.

For some reason, last night you got the doggy crazies and ran up and down the yard like you were a puppy again.  And I watched and tried to freeze that moment in time.  Because you were beautiful and happy.

Emmalisa Von Woos Woos Spaniella, your forever home is within my heart.  Even when you are no longer here physically, there you will reside.

Will you let me know?

Intelligent Disobedience

She took the trolley and climbed down these stairs to make it to her appointment.

The GPS device told her to turn right and head down this path

GPS did not tell her ahead of time about the traffic noise and speeding cars that dominate this busy section of road.  The device didn't warn her about  the river to the right or the stretch of road hugging a freeway with  no sidewalk on that side. No big deal.  She would see it when she got there.

Only she could not see any of this.  She was blind.  I watched from the opposite direction as she tried in vain to cross this road.  Following the directions of the GPS, she grew slightly frustrated and cross with her companion and his tenacious refusal to proceed across the road.  The rain fell, winds swirled and cars sped dangerously through the slick streets on this Friday in February.  She wanted to get there!  Her stubborn companion held his ground with dogged determination. 

"Fine!" she said.  

She turned to walk away in the opposite direction.  She was very quick.

 I could read her companion's body language.

 "Woman, just listen to me!"  

He rushed to block her way before she fell into the rushing stream.

She implored him to move, but he refused.  Finally resigned, she calmly allowed her friend to lead her where he wanted to go.

 

He didn't argue or boast about being right.  He was the perfect gentleman.  What a handsome guy he was!  How could he remain so calm in the face of her emotions and not respond with an outburst of exasperation of his own?  

Because he was a beautiful, sweet-spirited, highly trained, intelligent dog!  And someone took him as a puppy, loved and raised him for a year, then returned him (no doubt in a bittersweet moment of sacrifice) to learn to be a guide dog.  I give thanks for this person, the people who trained him and his current mistress.  She had to learn to allow him to guide her and trust him.

How did he recognize the south side of the street held no crosswalk?  What made him realize the only safe path was the north side of the street?  To see him in action was amazing and awe inspiring.   He practiced intelligent disobedience, which is the opposite of blind conformity.

It was such a kick in the arse opportunity for gratitude.   Heading back from lunch, I was lost in a little shit show moment of sadness.  A couple of disappointments that week and a misunderstanding with someone I love dearly weighed on me.  Then I saw the everyday struggle this woman endures.  Sight is something we take for granted.  Her blindness reminded me to see what a gift we have in all of our senses, talents, friends, family and amazing creatures on this earth.  

I'm not going to pretend I won't have a few more shit show moments in the future.  I'm human.  I just hope I continue to remember this moment of clarity.  I want my silly, sensitive psyche to engage in intelligent disobedience and guide me to the intersection of gratitude and awe.